自我贬低

常常不顾形象的疯狂

其实

常在想

我也许是颗让人困扰的老鼠屎吧？

别人常迁就我

心情不爽就表现出来

别人没欠我

为什么自己就是不能控制呢？

的确

我感觉我就是颗套讨人厌的老鼠屎

真的好讨厌这样的自己

不同的生活感触

总想着以后会遇见谁谁谁

以后会好好的对待刚认识的人

以后会更加珍惜以后的

以后的

以后的

以后。。。。

其实阿

每当我们这样想后

慢慢的

现在的人事物开始被忽略了

今天起

要每天好好的珍惜每个认识的人事物

时间就像渺小的细沙

少少的一点一点慢慢的流失

总是不留意慢慢从手缝隙中流失

贪心的想要抓着全部

也抓不住

所以阿

能抓的就好好珍惜吧

毕竟以后未必还能够过着现在的生活

一辈子,会重新遇见认识多少层次的人?

啊?
这样的问题我想过很多次
个人觉得应该需要不错多次一下

最小最小的时候就是家人
我们第一个遇见的朋友就是家人们
认识教会我们人与人的相处之道

慢慢的上了幼稚园
第一次遇见与我们毫无血缘关系的人类
有些大胆的,有些含蓄的
很庆幸自己是马来西亚人
因为我们能够接触友族了解不同的文化

幼稚园阶段之后
留下的朋友会很少
因为90's的我们那时只能用家里电话还没有手机联络
各自上了不同的小学

小学生涯?
开始有分班系列
原本幼稚园同班的派去了不同的班
距离也开始疏远了
又要花时间重新认识新的朋友
还记得我的学校是在四年级开始以成绩分班
不善于交朋友的我
让我小学的回忆那些的朋友就有些有点算泛泛之交
当然也有一些还是有时少许联络的朋友

糊糊涂涂的
就上了中学
这里的朋友是最长久的
这里开始会交上那种以姐妹相称的朋友
因为刚开始有了手机
所以为了和朋友聊天说心事
愿意熬夜聊天
每天都躲在被里偷偷信息朋友
这时期的朋友是最长久的
因为她们了解你家所以一切
你的感情,你的心事什么都会和朋友说
这时期是最真的朋友
你们会一起疯过
会一起做过小学不敢尝试的东西

当然补习朋友也是其中一小阶段

到了五年后毕业
上了大学先修班
你又需要认识一群完全离乡背景的朋友
大家的生活不一样
有些幸运的会同中学同学一起去
但,未必还是与中学的感情一样
因为会你们会开始吸引不同种类的朋友
慢慢的距离又会被拉开
之后既是没上同样的大学还是有些会有时问候一下

上了大学
会有一群新的朋友
我现在处于大学时期
或许离开异乡
特别会依赖朋友
有时还是会联络中学的好姐妹
这种思念家里那些你所第一次认识的朋友那就是家人
感觉确实会许多的失落

认真想了想
认识遇见的朋友是的确还满多阶段的
所以随着时间长大
吵架过,冷战过,欢笑过
还愿意陪你留下的朋友才显得那么珍贵那么独特
谢谢你们
我最珍贵的宝贝们
谢谢你们愿意留在我这个超级小姐脾气刁难任性的人身边
你们是对我是多么的珍贵的人
谢谢你们 :)

原来

如果我回来 有没有人等待
如果我孤单 会不会谁明白
想象着再见面却怕自己不勇敢
时光隧道传来回音
请你听你听一听
那是我们当时幸福约定

有些人打从心底没有忘记

原来你已经不在我世界里了
原来你已经不再属于我了
原来你已经换号码了
原来…

发现

我发现

好多女生开始交往了
越是幸福
就越荒废了部落格

也许这就是现实中满满的幸福吧??
满到无需泛滥这孤独在部落格
因为幸福已经满包围着她们的世界
无需与孤单作伴

在这孤单的世界
有人的陪伴,真好

一个人再认真也不能让幸福成真

To my future Boy

Dear Future Boyfriend,

Hi,boy! I’m not sure if I met you already, but I’d like you to know a few things about me. I am both a blessing and a curse. Well, more of a curse, but I’m nice and loving, and probably the best girlfriend you could possibly ever have. Trust me! Everything will be worth it. Actually, I am worth it. I just hope that you can tolerate all the stuff that I’m gonna put you through.

1. Understand pre-, during, post-menstrual instabilities

I’m a mess when I have my period, so please make me feel pretty and loved. I’m also a bit sensitive and emotional (well, actually A LOT), so I’ll be needing all the hugs and kisses you can give. Or whatever, just be there for me!

2. Sometimes, the best things in life are free.

I hope you know that I prefer dates over gifts. I mean, cliché as this may sound but it’d be heaven here on earth if I get to eat my favorite dessert, at the same time, spend time with my favorite person — you. Aww, nothing beats that!

3. I’m your girlfriend, not your daughter.

Keep in mind that I don’t like you to pay the entire bill. It’s your (or more like your parents’) money, so use it to pay for your own food. I can pay for my own. The only time I’d allow this to happen is on our special dates like anniversaries (but not monthsaries please). Besides, we can both use some savings, maybe to fund our next trip together, so as not to bother our parents or guardians for these extra expenses.

4. It’s nice to spend some time apart.

You know how important studying is for me (oh! And getting high grades too), so I hope you’d be understanding if I can’t talk to you or chat with you often. I think it’d be nice for you to miss me every once in a while. Sometimes, these times apart help us grow and flourish.

5. Simple yet sincere over grand superfluous gestures.

I love receiving good mornings and good nights. It’s like you’re reminding me that I’m the first thing that pops in your mind every morning you wake up, and the last thing you think about before you sleep. It’s okay if it’s as simple as that; I actually prefer that over the long ones. I don’t need those wordy cheesy messages, because (1) it’d hurt to see the transition that after some time, those long messages will eventually just be the simple ordinary greetings; and (2) we both know that I always sleep late and wake up late, so I don’t think I have enough time to read everything everyday. I mean, I appreciate the effort, but it’s the thought that counts. So just keep it simple and sincere.

6. Meeting half way.

Please put up with my drama and self-esteem issues. I always rant about my weight or about my waistline, but I just want to look good for you. I don’t want you eyeing someone else, who’s skinnier or better than me. I can be very jealous, but put my heart and mind at ease by telling me what you want and I’ll try my best to be that person. You can have your fair share of agony when I tell you what I want. It’s all a matter of give and take.

7. I should not be the Number 1. I should be the only one!

Constantly reassure me that you love me and that there is no one else. JUST ME. And just in case you have someone else, just tell me. I definitely don’t want to spend my time with some half-hearted asshole, and you definitely don’t want to waste your time with someone who’s going to kick your ass the moment she knew your indiscretions. That being said, let’s move to #8.

8. Honesty still is the best policy.

Honesty is highly appreciated. If you don’t love me anymore (huhu please don’t! I want you to be my last already!), tell me. Again, as previously stated, it’d be best for the two of us.

9. Over and above everything else, just be yourself.

We both don’t want to stay in a relationship banked on some fictitious act. I don’t want to fall in love with the actor of you. I want the real you. In one way or another, we’d know our true colors, so why not show who you really are in the first place? What better way to feel good about ourselves (and our relationship) than to know that despite all of our inadequacies, someone still loves us for who we are.I know we may and will definitely fight, but if we stick together, fix things, understand each other and don’t let our prides take over, no doubt, we’ll be invincible ;) And maybe, if you’re there, reading this post, you might want to give me a hint on how to react and behave, how to find you or at least when you’re coming?

PS. I’m patiently waiting for you, for the right time, for the right everything.